Rankys-Ramblings-etc

Ranky's Six Months of Tormenting Fear and Struggle

2011-01-17T11:42:00.001-06:00

"There isn't any hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann (The story is True)
II Cor 1:8-11 (KJV)
    We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers and sisters, about the troubles we experienced in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself. 9 Indeed, we felt we had received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. 10 He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us again. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, 11 as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many.
    Ranky made reference in the praise prayer sheet (Sunday School) more detail to come later concerning Jan 2010. Ranky relates my personal struggle at that time to the words of the Apostle Paul, II Cor. 1:8-11. While Ranky did not believe Ranky was under the sentence of death, Ranky questioned whether or not Ranky would be able to continue teaching.
    I know the difficulty of praying for someone in a chronic health/other situations. The chronic health/other problems will usually remain. In the past, Ranky would call or contact class members and some outside our church when Ranky believed Ranky had exhausted himself and all the medications and was literally at the end of his rope.
    Ranky's chronic pain levels remain in the same patterns. But, what changed, enabled Ranky's mind to be set free, somewhat, and Ranky was able to focus. The nature of the stinging pain changed from stinging to a non stinging type pain. The struggle continued about 6 months, more detail later in this page.
    This is a testimony to you, who prayed for Ranky. There were some that God called to be intercessors for Ranky and SweetCakes. One lady, could not sleep, and prayed off and on all night for SweetCakes & Ranky. God was indeed speaking to her and using her. She told me concerning her night of compassion and agony in prayer. That is a person, who is chosen for intercession. Whether or not this intercession for us was in the time frame doesn't matter. Prayer is timeless and that intercession stayed the hand of Satan against us. This fits with the subject we are teaching, in Sunday School, intercessory prayer. There were others, Ranky believes who have interceded for SweetCakes & Ranky at different times.
    One class member was in Ranky's home 2-3 times, when God gripped him with an urgency in prayer to intercede for us.
    And again, Ranky wishes emphasize that praying for folks with chronic conditions or illness, is hard because one knows the chronic conditions or illness will usually remain. But, the praying will sustain that person and enable that person to endure and continue.
    So, without several of you praying for Ranky and SweetCakes, we would not be able to teach and may not even be here. Some may tire of seeing the line in the Sunday School prayer sheet requesting prayer for SweetCakes & Ranky.
That line will always be there, because someone will pray and it will make a difference.
    Ranky encourages everyone to keep a prayer journal and at times pray over the requests and praise over the answers, yes or no(s). No is an answer.
    Now the rest of the story that lasted from Jan 2010 – May or June 2010. My dad and siblings all suffered dementia in their late 70s and eventually Alzheimer's disease. When in Jan 2010, Ranky suffered embarrassing memory blanks while teaching. Ranky allowed Satan a place in my flesh by focusing on the fear of failure to respond adequately in class or just become blank. My focus was on dad and his siblings and it was happening to me early. Fear became an obsession for those 6 months.
    Ranky asked David to be in class with me, Ranky was afraid Ranky would go blank and just go into a panic attack. David was my security blanket. Ranky even sat in class while David taught. Ranky wanted to just quit and go away, but the class just kept coming to class. Also, Ranky is stubborn,Ranky would just stand and not let Satan have his way. One has to face fear, this one was unholy. Ironically, we were studying Ephesians chapter 6, Ranky believes.
    II Tim 1:7 (KJV) For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. This was the verse Ranky quoted to himself, God, and Satan several times a day for 6 months.. Ranky looks thru the bible, Ranky find “Do not fear” and fear mentioned many times to believers. So, it is very safe to say as humans we deal with fear in our lives quite often. While Ranky does have victory over that battle with Satan, Ranky expects other battles with Satan, sin, and chronic conditions. Those can only be won by spiritual resources, prayer, His Word, and His people. Thank you, David and thank you class for praying and continuing to come to class. That kept me going. Ranky knows as Ranky approaches 67 years old with conditions that will plague Ranky and SweetCakes until we die, Ranky will at some time have to step aside as a teacher. Ranky just hopes no one has to tell me, it is that time.
    I'm grateful for being in a position to make a difference in many lives. Ranky does know that Ranky is a small potato in a very large field (world), but when God speaks to one and uses those who are obedient, it is a big deal. “It is a God Doing Thing.”
    Ranky knows the chronic pain in his life will continue. Ranky knows he will suffer some defeats in spiritual warfare and daily living. Ranky knows Ranky wins the war. The war was won on the Cross, Christ crucified and risen. Ranky did not enjoy the 6 months of fear and torment, but Ranky would not take anything for the journey now. Ranky's prayer is this testimony of God's provision, His people praying and their support will help someone who is struggling regardless of their situation, as God wills. (PTL)
Love in Christ,
Ranky

C. Potter 's Pottery (Post Two)

2011-01-15T11:42:00.004-06:00

One of Ranky's Face Book friends posts comments that are very funny to Ranky. Ranky ask him if Ranky could share some of those posts. They could be true or fiction. Ranky doesn't know and doesn't ask. I walked into the den this morning. El Gato was sitting on the hearth with his Laptop computer. He was reading about our congressmen. He looked up at me and said "Isn't it great to live in a society where the penalty for lying to a congressman can be up to 30 years in jail, but the penalty for a congressman lying to you is another t...wo years in office". ///

I went into El Gato's room to tuck him into bed. He knelt down beside his bed to do his evening prayer and said "all I ask for this year is a big fat bank account and a slim body. Please do not mix up the two like you did last year." El Gato told me he was walking past a bathroom door when he heard Ol'Rambler yelp real loud went in to see what was wrong. said he ask are you Ok Ol'Rambler? yes he said except when I flush this commode something pulls my tail real hard. Said he looked and Ol' Rambler was sitting on a mopbucket with his tail caught in the wringer.

///El Gato was looking out the window when I saw him. I asked what ya got on your mind this morning guy? He didn't even look back at me and said. "I was thinking about what I could give away and keep at the same time." I said "nothing if you give something away you can't keep it" He said "what about your word don't you think if you give your word that you should keep it?"///

Abominable Snowman (Yeti)

2011-01-10T16:22:00.000-06:00

“There isn't any hair growing on the pictures." - Gerald Mann (The pictures are real )
Follow the tracks and one may catch a glimpse of "The Abominable Snow Ranky", Yeti Ranky.

What the Heck; A Thrill is a Thrill

2010-09-23T03:45:00.000-05:00

"There isn't any hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann (The story is True)
Ranky was watching his favorite college football team play on ESPN. Ranky had also brought the game up on espn3.com, his wide-screen laptop computer. Ranky was laying on the bed watching Alabama, his favorite team. That goes back to the early 60's when Pat Trammel would come to the local football field and workout with his receivers. Trammel was a legend at Scottsboro High School due to his athletic abilities in all sports plus a real brain. He led Alabama to a 1961 Championship, may have been more.

SweetCakes and Ranky has a grandson at Alabama who also plays in the million dollar band. SweetCakes never watches football, but guess what? When Alabama plays SweetCakes is locked in like a laser beam. She is immovable. She is waiting for a glimpse at her grandson, Augan-Boy. It usually doesn't happen, but that is a Grandma's love and tenacity in action.

SweetCakes was watching on the wide screen HDTV in the master bedroom. Ranky heard Grandma cry out, it's not working. Somehow, ESPN on our cable was having some problems. Ranky always will fix things for SweetCakes. Ranky takes his laptop into the master bedroom makes the connections to transfer the sound and picture from the laptop to the wide-screen TV. Works well, prior to the completion, ESPN started working again. So, Ranky left the laptop on the floor showing the game and lay down with SweetCakes to watch the game on the big wide-screen TV. All is well, Big Screen on and the backup laptop in the floor on, both displaying the game. There must have used different cameras for each view, both were live real time, but showed different views.

SweetCakes went to the kitchen for something. Ranking was watching both views of the game. I looked and behold Augan-Boy covered the whole screen on the laptop. There he was our first born grandson at Alabama. I was thrilled to see him. Sorry, SweetCakes missed him. I was screaming for SweetCakes to hurry to see Augan-Boy, but too late Augan-Boy flashed on by.

I begin to wonder why Augan-Boy wasn't in his band uniform. That was answered quickly, the laptop had gone into screen saver mode, which displays all our home pictures. Well, I was thrilled for a little time, got SweetCakes excited, but we could see Augan-Boy as much as we wished by just watching the screen saver on the laptop scroll the family pictures.

Oh, well; Back to the game and real time. It was a thrill, even if for a little while.

Ranky and SweetCakes 45 year Anniversary and Looking Back...

2010-09-17T17:30:00.001-05:00

C. Potter's Pottery (Post One)

2010-08-21T10:50:00.000-05:00

One of Ranky's Face Book friends posts comments that are very funny to Ranky. Ranky ask him if Ranky could share some of those posts. They could be true or fiction. Ranky doesn't know and doesn't ask.
Had alazy country buddy one time that added ”erns” on lot of his wordslike blue “bluerns” red“rederns” We’es out pickingblackberries one day He always eat more than he carried home. Wasgaherin and eatin when ol Buddy says to me “do blackerns havelegerns” No Buddy you know blackerns don’t have legerns.Fats-My-Jesus I believe I done fulled my belly with tumblin bugsthinkin them blackerns crawlin around down here
///
Starting a new nationalmovement “STTS Save The Turn Signals” Automobile Turn Signals aremore precious than life it’s self. A lot of people won’t use thesignals even when it might save a life. How many times have youwrecked or almost wrecked because someone thought saving the turnsignal was more important than your life. Alabama’s Moto seems tobe “Don’t use the Darn turn signal Let’m guess where yourgoing” next I will be wanting people to turn on their lights whenit is raining, maybe even at dust and dawn when it is hard to seeyour vehicle by oncomming traffic!
///
Minister parked his carin a no-parking zone he was late and couldn't find a space. He put anote under the windshield wiper that read "I have circled theblock 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment.FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES." he returned, to find a citationalong with a note. "I've circled this block for 10 years if Idon't give you a ticket I'll lose my job “Lead Us Not IntoTemptation."
///
My best friend and I wastalkin today bout thangs that we saw and or did afore we was fullgrowed. He told me about a time when his paw had a 1950 Studebakercar (that’s a car which looks like it is coming and going at thesame time). They’s a bunch of kids in the family just like in myfamily when we was a growin. Anyhow my friends dad took a BlackFlagfly sprayer and painted that car black one day.

////

JesusLoves me! Jesus died for all the children of the world. Marie wassinging this while cooking lunch one day as the grand kids playedunder the window. During lunch one of the children started to singthis song. He had misunderstood some of the words, (she said) andsang Jesus diapered all the children in the world!

////

Thismorning I was shavin El Gato was a sittin on the vanity looking inthe mirrow playin with his whiskers he said "There is a new scamgoing on at wal-mart on old men. When you go to your car two women inshorts and skimpy tops run up wash your windshield then ask for aride to McDonalds on the way they steal your wallet." Then heSaid "Mine got stolen aug 5,6,7, 8 and 3 times on the 9th." ElGato Told me they are running a sale on men's wallets at wal-martsaid they were $1.59 each. He said they looked cheap but if they aregonna get stole the are good enough!

Ranky Makes the Same Innocent Mistake Twice

2010-06-27T22:41:00.000-05:00

“There isn't any hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann (The story is True)
Ranky's daughter, Fancy Gracious, worked in a position that afforded vendors the opportunity to give her writing pens. These were very good pens that advertised the vendor's product on the pen. Fancy would give her dad, Ranky, a few pens occasionally. Ranky would pitch the pens in the top dresser drawer.

When a pen was no longer usable, He would grab a couple of new pens from the drawer on his way to work or church.

Ranky knew there were some pens in his stash which advertised V???r?. The following incidents happened while Ranky 63-65 years old. Ranky's age might dictate Ranky needed this particular enhancement, erectile dysfunction (ED) medication. Ranky will use the name ED in this post to refer to the popular drug for ED (erectile dysfunction).

Ranky was always on the look out for some fun or prank. Ranky was always teasing his wife, SweetCakes, that he was going to one of her ladies mission meetings and plant some ED pens for their use. Sometimes, SweetCakes would ask for pens to provide to her ladies at those meetings. SweetCakes would tell him, “Don't you dare embarrass me by doing that.”

Ranky has long distance vision, which makes Ranky very good at reading signs and exits on the interstate highways. Ranky requires reading glasses to read. One morning in a hurry to get to work, Ranky needed a pen. He grabbed a pen from his stash. He didn't have on glasses, Ranky wasn't reading. Ranky was going to work.

Ranky went about his day at work. Ranky liked to talk while interfacing with several different folks that particular day. Several of those folks were ladies. Ranky was six feet tall so Ranky was taller than all the women Ranky interfaced with that day. Ranky noticed some of the ladies would look at his chest level and their eyes would shift away. This happened more than once.

Ranky figured he had spilled some coffee or cake on his shirt, so Ranky checked out the front of his shirt. Nothing there, Ranky just dismissed the looks as a coincidence. Unbeknown to Ranky, the pen in his pocket was an ED pen. The word, “V??G??” was clearly visible to anyone seated facing Ranky or anyone standing in front of him.

Ranky worked with young black lady, who was recently hired by the company. Ranky liked this young lady from the first day. She was frank and a lot of fun. Ranky and Christmas Candy could discuss any subject from A-Z without embarrassment or arguing. We were very transparent with one another. She was smart, handsome, and a Crimson Tide football fan. She knew more about Alabama football than Ranky. Most importantly, She loved the Lord Jesus.

Ranky got back to his desk. Christmas Candy looked at Ranky and said, “Ranky I really like your ED pen.” Well, that explained all the ladies looking away from my shirt. We had a good laugh and there were several folks, men and women in the office.Everyone in the office had a hoot. A defining moment to be remembered forever,

Well, after that Ranky should have tossed the pen, but Ranky didn't. A year or so later, Ranky was headed out the door to church. Ranky needed a pen, reached in his stash of pens without his reading glasses. Ranky had forgotten about the ED pen. Ranky taught the Sunday School class, which is 60% or more ladies. Ranky went to the main service after Sunday school. Ranky likes to move around in the sanctuary greeting and talking to folks, especially visitors before the service.

After church, Ranky walked into his living room. Some of the family was there for SweetCakes' home cooking. His daughter, Fancy Gracious was there. First words out of her mouth, “Dad, I like your ED pen.” Ranky thought, “O Lord, How many ladies at church saw the advertisement.” I don't think anyone noticed the pen, but I don't really know for sure.

Ranky has the reputation for honesty. I'm sure if anyone saw the pen in my shirt pocket, they would believe Ranky believed in ED from personal experience. Ranky would not advertise falsely, especially in church, unless Ranky was unaware He was advertising. Be assured, Ranky was unaware. Ranky thought about his teasing SweetCakes about placing ED pens at her ladies mission meeting. Ranky was brought to the reality, “What goes around, comes around.” Maybe, Ranky reaped what he sowed.

Ranky Evens the Balance Sheet with SweetCakes

2010-05-12T22:23:00.000-05:00

“There isn't any hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann (The story is True)
Ranky was teaching the Abundant Life class along with SweetCakes. The subject was husbands and wives relationships. Ranky admits to being somewhat overboard in the early years on "the wife to submit to their own husbands."

SweetCakes had a few of Ranky's sins to confess to the class. She loves to confess Ranky's sins and some of the really crazy stuff Ranky does, and Ranky doesn't mind. Ranky enjoys the visibility, even though it is not in the best possible light. "Any visibility is better than no visibility." - GM Ranky earned his early years reputation, fair and square. Even after the Lord graciously saved Ranky, Ranky was still a barbarian, caveman, and Red Neck to the nth degree. Ranky did think SweetCakes was a little hard on him that particular Sunday. It was really how she felt and she had every right to feel the way she did. I had much growing to accomplish. With the Lord's help, I'm not there, but I'm not where I used to be. Thank God. So, in the interest of fairness, Ranky thought bringing to remembrance all the good things Ranky does as a husband would balance the sheet with SweetCakes. SweetCakes has a Face Book account which she leaves logged in.

Ranky wrote in SweetCakes' status the following: God has blessed me with a husband who awakens me with a very soft kiss to my cheek. When I awake, I know he has cleared the kitchen, cleaned the floors, cleaned the bathtub and has the water ready for me to begin my day. He calls me pet names. In a contemporary society the biblical command for wives to submit ...to their own husbands is unpopular, is not a problem for me. He's worth it. - SweetCakes ; Ranky was surprised at the number of women who jumped on the status telling her she had a gem, etc. Some brought up their own husbands and their greatness. SweetCakes did expose my Face Book invasion into her account. She, graciously, admitted all the things Ranky said was true and Ranky actually did much more.

So, the sheet is balanced once again, we are even. If one should think, Ranky invaded her privacy and it was a bad thing for Ranky to do, Ranky believes in following the leadership of his pastor. Ranky learned this equalizer technique from his pastor, Bolder Gaderholt.

Ranky was proud of himself, felt good about his promotion and good visibility. Also, SweetCakes public admission that Ranky actually did those things for her, daily. Husbands love your wives, it is an action.

Comfort for Raffi Plowman Pior to His Surgery

2010-04-30T21:53:00.000-05:00

“There isn't any hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann (The story is True)
Ranky is a Southern Baptist deacon. Ranky has served in three churches as such. The office of deacon opens many opportunities for service and also opportunities that are sometimes surprising, humorous, and fearful.

The following is one of those surprising times and humorous with the exception of the patient awaiting surgery. The patient Raffi Plowman was a friend of mine and fellow deacon. Ranky knew Raffi was a big man and not afraid of most of life experiences. The exception was surgery, he dreaded the surgery. I was there in the pre-op room with Raffi and his wife,Leala.

Leala is delightful young lady always smiling, cracking jokes, and just plain fun to be around. Actually, Leala is a little off center the same as Ranky, so we clicked pretty well in ministering to Raffi. Ranky was glad to have influenced Raffi and Leala in a positive way, spiritually.

Leala and Ranky were there to give Raffi moral support, pray, and alleviate any fears he may have. Ranky was the recipient of many surgeries and Ranky is still alive and well. Ranky understood the process, the do's and don't of comforting a perspective surgical patient.

We all had held hands and prayed. I believe Raffi obtained some peace from the exercise plus the Holy Spirit's Presence. Raffi was still very frightened, I could read the signs. sweaty palms, rapid breathing, loss of coloring in the face. Leala and Ranky attempted to direct his mind away from the soon to be surgery and reminisced about some good old times.

Things were in hand and settled and then low and behold another one of ordained members came to pray and give comfort. His name was Choctaw, maybe from his Native American roots. Choctaw was already "SPUN UP" and LOUD as he came into the room.

Choctaw was laughing and talking non-stop. He begin to tell stories. Stories about surgeries that had gone bad.Ranky was afraid Raffi was going to bolt the room and go home. Ranky attempted to offset the inappropriate stories for a guy who was already frightened concerning surgery.Ranky was holding his own until Choctaw, told all of us about the guy who was having his leg amputated. The leg had to go, gangrene. Unfortunately, according to Choctaw, the surgeons amputated the wrong leg. This meant to save the patient's life, the surgeons had to go back to surgery and amputate the bad leg. Now, the patient had no legs verses the one leg he should have had. Choctaw was laughing and saying wasn't that a real happening and it happens more than one thinks. Choctaw makes many hospital visits.

No one was laughing now, but Choctaw. His laughter was echoing through the hospital halls. Ranky begin to pray the Lord would call Choctaw to another task. Sure, enough Choctaw had to leave suddenly, wishing Raffi the best and to make sure the surgeons operated on the correct part. Choctaw waved and was gone.

Ranky looked at Leala her eyes were rolling and she was vividly angry. Rightly so, Ranky smoothed things over as much as possible. Ranky assured Raffi God's promises were true regardless of our fears and recent undesired encouragement from Choctaw. Ranky prayed again, Raffi did well through the surgery.

Ranky wasn't for sure all He learned, but Ranky was going to be in every hospital room that Ranky knew Choctaw was going to be visiting.

Well, Raffi, Leala, and Ranky laugh about this 20 years later. Choctaw was totally unaware of the havoc, he created.

The saying, "different strokes for different folks", is somewhat true. Those kind of stories prior to surgery would not bother Ranky, in fact Ranky has made some of the same kind of jokes during his surgery pre-op. But, Ranky doesn't make jokes when he knows that person is scared to death.

Some folks will never learn anything else, until they know there is something else to be learned.

Did The Mice Follow The Lemmings Into The Sea?

2010-03-29T17:22:00.000-05:00

“There isn't any hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann (The story is True)
Ranky, being in his sixties, has accumulated quite a bit of information over the years and is ever learning. Ranky is always asking questions. Ranky is not interested in gossip or a litany of untruths. Ranky is interested in clean jokes and any information that enhances Ranky's learning. Ranky has an insatiable appetite for acquiring and assimilating information.

Several of the younger adults and parents will call Ranky asking him for solutions to problems or just information. One day Ranky received a call from one of his Sunday School members. She is a very fine young lady, smart, and very devoted to Christ and His church. Ranky is like a dad to her. Ranky is honored to be called dad by this young lady. She is about 30 years old has 4 children and a husband "Teddy Bear". Ranky has known her for about 40 years. :) Her name is Candi Thatcher.

One Monday morning Candi called Ranky and she was hysterical. She was going to move out of her house that day, the mice were taking over, she had more on her plate than she could stand. She was seeing and hearing mice everywhere. When she would drive into her driveway at night she could see the mice running across the road.

Ranky listened and eventually had the opportunity for input and questions. Ranky could have helped her sooner, but sometimes we exhaust every means known to us and then seek counsel from someone. Ranky was the last resort for her or she was packing her clothes and her and the kids were going else where. Not another night in the house being held hostage by a hoard of mice.

Ranky asked the following questions: Did she live close to open fields? Were there any openings by the house doors 1/8 to 1/2 inches to allow mice and rats access to the house? What had she done to eliminate the mice problem so far that did not work? Make a long story short, there were opportunities for the mice to enter the home. A door sweep had come loose on the front door allowing 1 inch opening along the bottom of the door.

Candi did live by open fields, so that would explain some of the abundance of mice. I suggested caulking all openings around outside plumbing, A/C connections, most importantly replace the front door sweep. Set mouse traps in a place the 4 children could not obtain access. We could not use chemicals because of the children.

I told her about the pest repellers that I used at my house. The pest repellers just plug into the electric wall sockets and use the home electric circuit to emit some noise levels that most humans cannot hear. I told her this made sense to me since one can use high level noise to scare dogs and cats away. Of course, Ranky got the usual horse laughs from his own family when he first purchased the pest repellers. But, after a year, we have not seen any rats,mice,roach bugs or any kind of pests, with the exceptions of some little moths. So, Ranky had the last laugh. Ranky likes "What works" and this works.

I told Candi I could not vouch for any pest repellers except the kind I had purchased. I would order her 3 for each floor of her home. She seemed satisfied and would work with the traps until the pest repellers came that I ordered.

This was a Monday and by Sunday I had the order and gave her six of the pest repellers. I told her if I did not believe these would alleviate her mice problem, I would never suggest it.Candi knows when Ranky believes something he does believe and that belief is catching. Candi believed also.

A week passes and Ranky calls Candi concerning the mice problem. Candi tells him they caught one in the traps, but she doesn't seem to hear the mice in the walls as much as prior.

Another week passes, Ranky calls Candi again to check on the mice problem. Candi tells Ranky there isn't any evidence of mice in the home. She has not seen or heard the mice in the walls. Ranky says, it seems your mice problem is solved. Candi says I believe it is, and I can sleep at night now.

Ranky talks to Candi quite a bit, in fact Ranky talks to several folks quite a bit. Ranky stays home a lot due to physical problems and he travels by cell phone and loves to be involved with people.

One day in a casual conversation, right out of the blue, Candi asks Ranky, Do you think I should open the front door and let the mice out? In Ranky's mind, he pictures the lemmings following one another into the sea. Candi is 100% serious about her question. Ranky chuckling inside silently, says yes open the door and stand back. It will be like a herd of buffaloes racing through the door, just don't get in the way.

Ranky begins to laugh out loud, he cannot contain himself any longer.Ranky tells her the mice are gone already, or she would have seen or heard them.Ranky could not keep from laughing about her serious and innocent question. Open the door to let the mice out.

Ranky still laughs when he thinks about Candi and her question that day.Ranky is smiling as he writes these lines.

Candi loves Ranky a lot because he struggles a lot physically and still wants to help people. She is glad she gave me a good laugh. It is a laugh that just keeps giving.

People can laugh about Ranky's rodent eradication solution, but it works. There aren't any mouse problems at Candi's house or Ranky's house.Ranky is glad Candi can sleep at night. But, Ranky has to wonder, where did all those mice go? Ranky wonders if some of Candi's close neighbors have mice problems now.

Ranky Does Not Believe There is a Difference Between a Pill & a Tablet.

2010-01-11T16:30:00.000-06:00

“There isn't any hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann (The story is True)

Ranky was a literal-minded 5 or 6 year old, this particular characteristic of Ranky hasn't changed much in 60 years. Ranky lived in a small town next door to a couple, who boarded an older lady. She was in her eighties, her chin touched her nose. She dipped snuff the same as most of the older ladies of that era, 1949-1950. I will call her Aunt Molly. Often, Aunt Molly would summon Ranky over to run an errand to the store. She would send for thread, snuff, and other small items. Ranky didn't mind because she would tip Ranky 5 or 10 cents. Aunt Molly kept her money tied up in an old handkerchief. Ranky could buy Ranky some candy or a coke. The candy and/or coke was a treat for Ranky, even though the store seemed miles away. Actually, the store was probably 800 yards or so away.

Good day, Aunt Molly summoned Ranky for an errand. She wanted a nickel tablet. There was money for Ranky, too. Ranky's mind got distracted on the way to the store. He thought, "What does Aunt Molly want with a nickel pill, she could buy a whole bottle of aspirin." The store owner came out patted me on the head and said,"What can I do for you young man?" Ranky said,"Aunt Molly wants a nickel pill." WHAT? you mean a bottle of aspirin don't you." No, Aunt Molly wants a nickel pill. What? you mean a nickel writing tablet don't you? No, Aunt Molly wants a nickel pill. Ranky is now 65 years old, Ranky tell folks jokingly at times the "R" in Ranky stands for being right. One of Ranky's traits to this day, if he thinks he is right, his theme song is the Baptist Hymn, "I shall not be moved." After 30 minutes of wasting the store owners time, who threw up his hands in desperation, muttered some bad words, told me to go back and have Aunt Molly write down on paper the item she actually wanted to buy. I said,"She wants a nickel pill." I will be back. The store owner was hot under the collar.

I got back to Aunt Molly's house, where's my tablet? Ranky told Aunt Molly, the store owner did not have a "Nickel Pill". Aunt Molly hit the roof screaming, I WANTED A WRITING TABLET. I told her she did not say writing, she just said, "nickel Tablet". Ranky knows what Aunt Molly said and it wasn't writing tablet. Ranky told her to write the item on paper and I would go back. She was steamed.

The store seemed more farther away the second trip.The store owner saw me coming, tried to act busy. But, Ranky was on a mission, Ranky gave the store owner the note with the item written on it. When he saw the writing tablet as the item, I got another tongue lashing. Ranky told the store owner Aunt Molly never used the word writing. That would have simplified things for Ranky. Well, I retrieved the writing tablet went back to Aunt Molly's house. She was still steamed.

With the trouble Ranky caused Aunt Molly, she was not going to pay me for the trip. Ranky wanted to know why, since Ranky had made 2 trips to the store verses one trip.She mellowed some gave me some change and here goes Ranky to the store for the third time. It's different this time, I'm own my own nickel. I had a coke and Babe Ruth. All is well that ends well.

Ranky could not understand why two adults got so upset because Aunt Molly left out the word writing. Aunt Molly should have used two words, writing tablet or writing pill, Ranky thinks he would have been able to make only one trip. Aunt Molly told me, "I should have known". I don't think adults understand Ranky. Ranky's world is simple, theirs is complex. I helped Aunt Molly to be more detailed in her directions and she was. "Time is never wasted if you learn something from your mistakes." - CAC Lady Aunt Molly learned detailed speaking from a 5-6 year old.

Some Hodge Podge Until Ranky Writes Another Big Story

2009-12-15T19:27:00.000-06:00

“There is some hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann (People and events were real; the hair in the story was the word, MA-TUR-ITY, attributed to SweetCakes, but added for embellishment.
Ranky actually used the word when Ranky told the story.      Ranky had worked with Jerry Hard-head for many years. Jerry was very familiar with Ranky and SweetCakes chronic health problems. Jerry had many internet friends sending him internet fwd: emails, jokes, cartoons, and etc. He would filter out the bad ones and send the good ones to SweetCakes' email.
    When SweetCakes could not sleep, she would go to the computer at 2-3 a.m. and play computer games and read Jerry's email. I could hear her laughing. One day I bumped into Jerry in the hall. "Hi",was never enough for Ranky, Ranky would ask questions and engage folks into conversations. Jerry asked Ranky were the email and jokes good for SweetCakes or should he discontinue those emails and jokes.
     I told Jerry to please keep sending the emails and jokes. "Laughter is medicine for the soul." Ranky knew the bible stated that quote. Also, Ranky could hear SweetCakes laughing at night, so Ranky knew this was experimentally true for SweetCakes.

      Jerry was about 10 years older than Ranky. It was easy to remember Jerry's Birthday. SweetCakes and Jerry became very "good bosom buddies" over the internet. Ranky went on Medicare Nov. 2009, so I'm 65.

    Ranky has a very small amount of mischief about him. Ranky begin to tease SweekCakes concerning her old boy friend. Her eye brows would go up about to the top of her head.

     Thanksgiving there was a big shin dig at Ranky and SweetCakes' home. Ranky had eaten enough sweets to "SPIN UP". Ranky was hyped so the sugar was doing it's job. This was family and folks were leaving and I wanted to tell one joke at least. When I mention a story, everyone was scrambling to get out and go home. My reputation for long stories had taken my audience. Ranky begged and said he would keep it short. I would even make the story up on the fly.

    Ranky told his family audience that this week, He had asked SweetCakes the following question:

SweetCakes, "What does your 75 year old boy friend have that I (Ranky) does not have?" Ranky said, SweetCakes answered "MA-TUR-ITY".

Ranky Was Having a Great Day; and Then the Police Officer Came

2009-11-21T21:19:00.000-06:00

“There isn't any hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann (It is true, I'm sorry to say, I was too focused to obey the yellow flag that went up.)
Ranky couldn’t be better. He had made it into town to get his blood pulled for his lab work. One stick ,

success and all was well. (Updated 20100206)

The previous night and day, chronic pain ruled and reigned over Ranky. Ranky took all the meds that were allowed, but to no avail. Relief was not to be found. Ranky lay on the bed and actually cried out to God for His help. Ranky went to sleep, but it was not a restful sleep. The next morning, He was so bad physically he could not drive. The pain began to rule and reign again. Ranky text-ed or called 5-6 of God’s prayer warriors, God had appointed for him. He explained the situation, so they prayed for Ranky off and on for 2-3 hours. The pain subsided to a degree with which Ranky could function. He called God’s prayer warriors and thanked them for participating with God in helping Ranky.

This good day was relative to the bad day, so Ranky was happy to be able to get out and do anything. Ranky drove his car to the fruit stand picked up some fruit, jellies, and candy. Ranky returned home, SweetCakes wanted to walk. Ranky said, ”OK”. Ranky and SweetCakes walked for 25 minutes, which was great for SweetCakes. Ranky decided to walk his regular route of 3.2 miles. Ranky is motivated.

SweetCakes has had several good days for her, she walked with me, and now I’m walking my regular route. As they say,” It doesn’t get any better than this.” An old friend, Ginger Farrow, had brought SweetCakes’ and my lunch. Roast beef, potatoes, carrots, and key lime pie. Just as Ranky had his fill, Lattice Evertall brought over one of her famous apple pies. Somehow, Ranky had convinced her that she owed me 2 apple pies. Ranky got one today, and later Ranky can call the marker in for the other apple pie. Lattice Evertall can make the best apple pies. She probably has a small step ladder to reach the stove; she is very short in height, but not in apple pie baking. After a large piece of apple pie, Ranky was ready to hit the road and get his 3.2 miles logged. Off Ranky went on his journey.

During Ranky’s walk, Ranky spotted some potential Bonanza Gold. Ranky called anything that was on the curb that might be salvageable, Bonanza Gold. Ranky looked over the potential Bonanza Gold, three perfect plastic containers. Ranky could see these as storage boxes. Ranky had not seen any plastic containers such as these. The fact the containers were in great shape should have raised a yellow flag. Ranky dismissed that idea since the containers were at the curb.

Ranky selected two to carry back to the house with him. His arms were tired after walking nearly a mile with the two containers. Ranky went back in his car and retrieved the third container. Ranky went to the drug store and then home.

A nice church lady, Ginger Farrow, that we became reacquainted via FaceBook had brought SweetCakes and me a nice lunch. We had roast, potatoes, carrots, bread, and key-lime pie. Just as Ranky finished his lunch, another one of our church ladies (Lattice Evertall) brought me a baked apple pie. Ranky had a piece of nice apple pie. What a great day it was! Praise the Lord.

As my thoughts did a fast rewind of the events of the day, Ranky was convinced this was one of Ranky’s and SweetCakes’ better days in a long time. We were grateful for the food, desserts, good Christian friends and the “Bonanza Gold” that Ranky recovered on the side of the road. “One person’s junk is another person’s treasure.”

We were seated in the living room enjoying the quietness of the evening and just relaxing after a good day. There was a knock at the door. It was dark; Ranky turned on the front lights in order to see the person who knocked. He looked nice enough and also had the abbreviations for the police department on his coat. Ranky thought, “Oh, no, they are collecting money”. Ranky opened the door and asked, “How may I help you?”

He told a very interesting story. The story was about someone getting three containers from a ladies yard. She had bought them from Kroger’s that morning for ten bucks a piece. Would Ranky happen to know anything about that? Ranky knew he knew Ranky knew something about that. He did knock on my door and Ranky remembered that it seemed someone was following me while Ranky was carrying his “Bonanza Gold”.

He told me she had bought them for recycle containers. Ranky said, “I thought they were on the curb for salvage.” Ranky was laughing, Ranky couldn’t believe this event. The officer was very nice. The lady only wanted her containers returned. Lattice Evertall, the church lady, had wanted two of the containers. She decided not to take the containers. She would have been in possession of stolen property. Ranky took the officer to the containers. He gathered the containers, wished me a good night. The officer said the lady was not angry or anything, but wanted him to retrieve the containers.

Back tracking somewhat, Ranky did tell the officer the whole story. He thought it was funny, too. Ranky told him, Ranky was a Southern Baptist deacon and Sunday school teacher. Ranky regrets that, because it is not a good advertisement for a deacon. Imagine, a policeman retrieving stolen goods, technically speaking, from a deacon’s home. Don’t you love those Southern Baptist deacons? The officer asked me where Ranky went to church, Ranky told him. He said, “I was baptized there when I was nine years old.” He asked about a lady who went there, Mercy Hurt. Ranky told him she is still there. He said,” The church was on his beat, he would like to see her.”Ranky told him to stop by and ring the buzzer, she would be glad to see him.

I sent Mercy Hurt an email informing her of the young officer who would be stopping by to see her. Ranky got to thinking was he just being nice or was he checking my story? Ranky didn't know. Ranky is wondering, Could Ranky still get arrested for an honest mistake? That stresses Ranky out.

Ranky is seriously thinking about giving up the hunt for “Bonanza Gold”. Some good reasons are as follows: Ranky will give the stuff away or use it. Ranky can buy anything with the value Ranky would find on the curb. This type of events frightens SweetCakes. Ranky guesses the thrill is in the hunt for the “Bonanza Gold.” The last two events of “Bonanza Gold” are just too much for someone who is prescribed anti-anxiety medication.

Ironically, the next study course for Sunday school is “Managing Stress”. Ranky can teach one thing, “not to do” that will lessen the stress factor.

(Updated) What is going on here? While walking in Jan. 2010, I noticed some bins similar to the ones I had taken erroneously. I was walking by the officer's house and saw those bins in his garage, In Feb. 2010, I was walking in the rain. The bins in front of the officers house were left out on the road. The recycle had run that day. You guessed it the 2 bins were exactly the same as the ones the officer took from my house, Now I;m not sure about the lady who missed her recycle bins, the only place I have seen like bins is at the officers house, Ranky doesn't know what to think, now. Is the officer a bigger thief and slicker talker than Ranky, or did he do the nice southern lie? They really was his recycle bins and he did the nice southern lie to make things better for him and me. I tend to think the latter. I will see him out one day, and Ranky will ask.

I Go a Fishing says Jonah Penny from Ranky's Sunday School Class

2009-10-29T21:54:00.000-05:00

“There is no hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann ;The events, the sequence of those events, and the people are real; THIS POST DOES NOT CONTAIN REAL NAMES.Ranky cannot read minds, so the projection of what people were thinking may have received some embellishment. Isit a sin for a Christian to skip Sunday School and church to gofishing? Read this story and you decide for yourself. Ranky will tellyou it is a sin for him, since God gave him a gift to teach and atime to teach. But, others will need to make up their own minds.

Rankyas a Sunday School teacher believes the teaching of God's Wordstrengthens and give maturity to those who are Christians. Ranky alsobelieves the Holy Spirit wants to control the believer's life to thepoint of envy (James 4:5). Ranky believes God's great love for usalways pursues us and wishes to direct our lives in the paths ofrighteousness. Sometimes, the Holy Spirit will correct us with gentlepersuasion and sometimes not so gentle, if we become stubborn orstiff necked against His Will.

JonahPenny was relatively new convert to Christ. His step dad , GoldfishEel ,was a very new convert to Christ. Jonah Penny's business wasdoing well and he bought a boat. Jonah Penny loved to fish. GoldfishEel loved to fish, also. Jesus' disciples fished for their livelyhood. So, fishing is not a bad thing in itself. I love to eat certainkinds of fish. To eat fish, they must be caught.

Rankynoticed Jonah was missing in Ranky's Sunday School class on thiscertain Sunday. Ranky figured Jonah was working because Jonah'sworkload required him to play catch up some Sundays. After SundaySchool, Ranky entered the worship center. He was looking for GoldfishEel. First he noticed, Dauphin Eel, Goldfish Eel's wife, was seatedalone. There was a huge vacancy next to her. No one could fill thatvacancy like Goldfish Eel, Goldfish Eel is 60 years old, but he isbig and very strong.

BeforeRanky could get to Dauphin Eel to ask her if Goldfish Eel was sick.Little Tender-Hearted Penny came to Ranky. Maybe, Tender-HeartedPenny was in the 4^th - 5^th grade. She was alsoJonah Penny's daughter. She liked Ranky because they were goodbuddies. She said, “Do you know where my dad and grand dad are?”I said,”No”. Little Tender-Hearted Penny told me they had a newboat and went fishing. She had this accusing look about her that toldme she did not like it that dad and grandpa went fishing duringchurch and Sunday School. She was also waiting for me to comment.Little Tender-Hearted Penny was not going to leave until I commentedon the fishing trip. Ranky told her, “Let's just pray for them, andhope they go fishing after church and that God would speak to theirheart.” That satisfied Tender Hearted Penny and she skipped away toher friends.

Ifound me a place to sit during the worship service in front ofDauphin Eel. As soon as I was seated, Dauphin Eel related the samestory to me as Tender-Hearted Penny. Dauphin Eel also did not likethe idea of her husband and son fishing during Sunday School andchurch. She had that accusing look and also waited for me to commenton the fishing trip. I told her the same thing as I had toldTender-Hearted Penny.

Thenext Sunday Tender-Hearted Penny met me in the hall. She asked, “Doyou know what happened to Dad and Grandpa last Sunday when they wentfishing?” I said,”I think I'm about to find out.” She told meDad and Grandpa got out in the middle of the lake and the boat motorquit. They had to peddle the boat all the way to the bank. She had awide grin on her face. When I saw Dauphin Eel, she told me the samething. She rolled her eyes as she said, “The Lord may be trying toget their attention.” I said,”you could be right.”

Twoor three weeks later, I had left Jonah Penny an email asking would hebe in Sunday School this Sunday. I didn't get a reply which wasunusual. Jonah Penny usually answered me at his convenience. I didn'tget a reply, so Ranky wondered if another fishing trip was on. Well,Sunday came, No Jonah Penny or Goldfish Eel.

Tender-HeartedPenny came running up the hall to meet me. She hugged me as she andRanky were good buddies. She couldn't wait to tell me that her Dadand Grandpa had gone fishing again during Sunday School and church.She thought this was a terrible deed. She kept standing in frontof me waiting for me to give her some type of answer. Ranky told herthat he could not pray for God to sink the boat that might bedangerous or hurt her Dad and Grandpa. I told Tender-Hearted Penny itwas best to leave those type things in the “Hands of the Lord.” Iwas glad that satisfied her . She is a very smart young lady. Shewould not allow me to leave until I gave her an answer that satisfiedher.

Ifound me a seat in the worship center and Dauphin Eel was alone. Iknew where Goldfish Eel was. He and Jonah Penny had gone fishing.But, just in case I did not have that piece of information, DauphinEel informed me of their whereabouts. She also rolled her eyes andsaid,”God was going to get their attention.” I said, “You maybe right.” Grandma and Granddaughter did not say so, but they weredisappointed in the event and really did not like that at all. Theybelieved they should be in church and Sunday school the same aseveryone else.

Ialways enjoyed seeing Jonah Penny and Goldfish Eel, in fact I lovedthem as brothers. They are my brothers spiritually. I missed themalso. But, I couldn't have a condemning attitude toward them, since Iknew there were worse things to do, and I had probably done some ofthose myself.

Ipreviously had asked Mackerel G., one the men in the Sunday Schoolclass to call Jonah Penny. Ranky wanted the members to be involved incalling absentees, also. When Ranky had the information that JonahPenny had gone fishing, He asked Mackerel Goldfish, “What did youtell Jonah Penny, to cause him to go fishing last Sunday?” Did yougo with him? You missed the objective. The objective was to get Jonahin Sunday School, not plot with him to go fishing. I was just givingMackerel G. a rough time, we were all laughing. We do have much funin the Sunday School class. In fact, I would hate to be the classnext door. We have lots of laughter.

Thenext Sunday rolls around quickly. Tender-Hearted Penny came runningto meet Ranky. She gives Ranky a big hug. She and Ranky are goodbuddies. She asks me, “Do you know what happened to Dad, lastSunday morning when they were fishing.” I said, “No, but I'mthinking I will get the story.” Tender-Hearted Penny says, “Dadfell out of the boat, went under the water, and had to swim for hislife.” She had a mischievous gleam in her eyes. She is a smartyoung lady, and I know she remembered me telling her, “We have toleave those type things in the Hands of the Lord”. I burst outlaughing because I remembered telling Tender-Hearted Penny and at thesame time I was telling her, Jonah Penny was swimming to get to thetop of the water.

Whenwe assembled for Sunday School, there was Jonah Penny smiling.Everyone talks at the same time before class fellowshipping with oneanother as much as possible. The Gentle Giant , one of the men inclass is in charge of starting the class. He rings a make believebuzzer to start us promptly at 10:00 am. I asked, Jonah Penny, “How'swork going?” To my surprise, out of the mouth of Jonah Penny camea confession. He said,” I can't lie, I was fishing last Sundaymorning and fell out of the boat.” Then, everyone in churchalready knew you were fishing, I wasn't going to say anything aboutit.” I said, “ We had a lot of fun with that last Sunday inclass.” He was so forth right about it and good natured. I had afield day talking about the two fishing trips and what was it goingto take for him to get the message. Everyone in class was having abig hoot at Jonah Penny's expense.

Rankythought his next story would be about some true life golfing tripsthat were almost unbelievable, but were true. It seems God wanted usto keep telling true life church experiences.

Well,I can't set in judgment on the fishing trip, it was a lot of fun forthe whole class. Logic tells me burned twice by trying fishing duringSunday School and church by new Christians, it's probably a bad ideato try it a third time. Tender-Hearted Penny will tell you it'swrong. Ranky doesn't know if he told Tender-Hearted Penny correctlyabout leaving some things in “God's Hands”. But, I will guaranteewhen she hears that term used again, she will be looking for God todo something to get someone's attention.

That'sthe story, you decide concerning the rights and wrongs of fishingduring Sunday School and church, if a Christian. I don't think itmatters if you are not a Christian. Christians are the ones who aresupposed to take advantage of the gifts of the Holy Spirit to thechurch in order to be properly trained to live the Abundant Life,follow Christ, make disciples, and be witness to the world. JonahPenny's nets came up empty, no fish. Ranky was hoping for a fish fry.Maybe, Jonah Penny's timing was wrong is the reason for lack of fish.Maybe Sunday Evening might have produced an abundance, enough for theSunday School Class to have a fish fry. I don't really know. I wouldprobably need to ask Tender-Hearted Penny. She would tell me.

Grandpa Can Never Have Too Much Help

2009-09-27T23:07:00.000-05:00

“There is no hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann
(Meaning the events & characters are true.)
///
The time had arrived for Ranky to perform maintenance on his lawn tractor.Maintenance included changing the oil and filter. Normally, Grandpa Ranky wouldbe very systematic and structured in performing maintenance. He would lay outthe new filter, the proper number of cans of oil, and etc. Grandpa Ranky hadthe routine fine-tuned.

The three oldest grandsons were present at GrandpaRanky’s home. That would be OganBoy, Sager, and Awesome. Grandpa Ranky had asked Sager to assist himin performing maintenance by the book. Sager was easily persuaded when somecash money was offered. Sager now had time to help Grandpa Ranky.We were about finished with the maintenance. We haddrained the oil, replaced the oil filter, and only lacked adding the new oil.

My other son, Tbone, drove up with three more grandsonsand PrincessTaylor. These grandsons would be “TheProfessor”, KarateKiddo, andHeyHey. KarateKiddo and HeyHey wanted on the tractor. Grandpa Ranky says, “It’sOK, just don’t crank the engine.” SweetCakes called me into the house to do a task for her.SweetCakes had broken my maintenance routine. I finally finished the “Honey do”list and then headed outside to finish the maintenance.

Somehow, Sager hadmoved the younger grandsons off the tractor. Sager, wanted to crank the tractorand drive it around the yard. The check out run, you might say. Grandpa out ofroutine said,” Crank her up.” Sager begin to drive around the yard. Grandpa Ranky beginto see smoke from the tractor and strange sounds like a hammer inside themotor. The sounds got louder and begin to chatter and shake the engine. Rankysaid, “Sager shut her down, something’s wrong.” Sager did not have to shut her down, theengine stopped and locked up.

Ranky, the man in charge of the maintenance operation,had gotten out of his structured routine. He begins to get this sinking,sickening feeling in his stomach. Heknew he had forgotten the last step; put the oil in the tractor. Well, Ranky felt sick, He knew anew engine was needed. Ranky ordered the engine online, Tbone volunteered toreplace the engine for me. He’s a good son and a hundred dollars later thetractor was on the road again. One mistake, lapse of memory, out of structurecost Grandpa Ranky $600.00.

I could point fingers, but first of all who was in chargeof the maintenance? If you guessed Grandpa Ranky,you guessed correctly. Don’t cry over spilt milk, it’s gone. No one was hurt,count your blessings and those are blessings. In the future, I will perform the maintenance when I am aloneand will not be distracted by other tasks. It is a great privilege to have 6grandsons and 2 granddaughters. But, when they are running, playing, hollering,and throwing balls, it is very easy to be distracted.

Big Foot, Bears, Horses, in Ranky’s Back Yard; Reality, Bad Dreams or A Mixture of Both

2009-09-13T19:45:00.000-05:00

“There maybe some hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann
The events in this post are true, the events in the dream are true to the extent that Ranky did dream those events in detail. Are those events in the dream true? Maybe/Maybe Not
////

RLS and peripheral neuropathy were having their way with me,ruling and reigning over my body. It was a painful night for me. All I could dowas watch worthless TV and take as many meds as I could without hurting myself.

Ranky was watching a TV show. They were in the woods looking forsomething and found some bear scat with some dog tags in the scat. This meantthe bear had eaten a person and passed the dog tag out by natural means. Clue 1: Bear scat (poop).

Later in the show I believe they shoot the bear. Clue 2:Bear (Big hairy animal).

Later in the show, the main leader on the TV show shot one of the bad guysin the buttocks. The man stopped running (Clue 3: upright man shot in buttocks)

Ranky finally went to sleep even with high pain levels. Itwas a fitful sleep with many times of awakening during the night. Ranky hadsome prescribed meds for sleep. He rarely took those because of night mares;generally details of the night mares could not be remembered. Ranky took one ofthe prescribed meds for sleep.

Ranky went to sleep and begin having weird dreams thatseemed to so real, in fact Ranky was half awakened from noise in the back yard.Ranky wanted to get up and check things out. SweeetCakes was sound asleep.Instead, Ranky just drifted back to sleep.

Ranky dreamed Big Foot was in the back yard dropping severalpiles of scat. Ranky heard Big Foot rattling the back door. Ranky got up,loaded my gun, and then went to the back door. Ranky opened the door; sureenough there was Big Foot. Big Foot begins to walk away from the door with hisback toward me. Several Big Foot sightings have been reported in a 10 mile radiusof my home.

Ranky shot Big Foot in the right buttocks (see Clue 3 above). Big Footturned a looked at me with a quizzical look. As if to say, why did you do that,you idiot? Big Foot was a hairy ape-like creature, about 6 feet 3 inches, notmuch taller than me. My bullet apparently did not hurt Big Foot, just irritatedhim. (Clue 3, upright man shot in buttocks in the movie). Big Foot came toward me, I froze in the door. I thought He would kill me, instead Big Foot hit me with his fist and everything went dark. I was out until the next morning.

When Ranky awoke the next morning it seemed Ranky couldremember every detail and Ranky had a very bad headache. The entire dreamactually seemed real.

I immediately told SweetCakes the story or dream orpartially true happenings. I told SweetCakes before I went outside to look forevidence of Big Foot and scat. Folks, it was that real to me. The dream orwhatever did seem so real to me that I really believed something went on; I mayhave actually shot Big Foot in the buttocks. I asked SweetCakes did she hearanything outside last night and also did I get up and shoot my gun atsomething? She said, “She did not know, but thought she would have heard a gunshot.”

I went outside to my back yard. I was shocked, there wasscat every where, (Clue 1 above.) This was actually large quantities of horsepoop (horse pucky) all over my back yard. I walked around to my drive way,horse pucky all over the place. Clue 2 large hairy animals (horses), apparentlyseveral horses had escaped to my back yard and drive way.

Besides, the easily recognizable horse manure, the groundwas soft allowing several deep hoof prints in my yard. I did not see any BigFoot tracks.

Later, that day I got my wheel barrow and shovel to beginthe task of scooping up the horse pucky. I retrieved a full wheel barrow ofhorse pucky. I dumped the pucky (Manure) in Sweetcakes’ flower garden. We havebeautiful flowers this year.

Something for your thoughts:

1. One of the bad guys in the movie was shot in the buttockswhile running upright. In my moment, I shot Big Foot in the buttocks as He waswalking away from me,upright.

2. The Horses were big hairy animals. In my moment, BigFoot was a big hairy animal. He was bigger than me, but not as big as I thoughthe should be.

3. The bear scat in the movie. In my moment, the horse manure(pucky), same thing as bear scat only my yard had several piles.

I plan to show some of SweetCakes’ flowers on my blog. Thefree fertilizer worked wonders. If any folks see a Big Foot with a limp in hiswalk, then more of this story may be reality than a dream or night mare. I haveseveral bullets for my revolver. I could not tell if any were used. I did notfind an empty shell casing, but Big Foot knocked me cold with a right hook tomy jaw. Did I tell you my neck was very sore the next morning and I had asevere headache?

You can draw your own conclusions concerning these events,but the dream seemed real to me.

There was proof of big hairy animals (horses) in my back yard.
There was proof of scat (horse pucky), an abundance I might say.
There isn't any proof of my shooting Big Foot in the right buttock, no yet.
SweetCakes will testify, Ranky told her the story before he went outside to the back yard.

Health Status of Ranky & SweetCakes

2009-09-12T20:55:00.000-05:00

Ranky received some requests concerning the status of his and his wife's health. This is a detailed explanation of our health or physcial status. Both are complicated and w/o a permanent cure. So, it is "One day at a time, sweet Jesus, one day at a time." Details are as follows:

SweetCakes believed she would die last June. I knew she was very sick and if something did not change, that could become reality. I knew that, but I refuse to project my thought life into a time of misery that hasn't happened. Tomorrow never comes, Yesterday is gone, God has given us this day to live to the fullest extent possible for His Glory.

I do understand the mechanics of her heart and it is amazing to watch her daily. She has improved tremendously and has a pretty structured routine. Her heart will not improve physically. She is doing all she can do to help herself.

She has an ejection fraction measured from the left ventricle of 20. Normal is 55-60+. This is a measure of the oxygenated blood pumped out of the left ventricle. A normal ejection fraction leaves blood in the left ventricle to be pumped out on the next contraction. She has a leaking mitral valve. In this case meaning, the valve doesn't close properly and allows some of the blood pumped out to back flow into the heart or lungs? She will always have congestive heart failure(CHF), but we will keep doing “what works” and live life to the fullest extent possible.

What I know concerning SweetCakes's heart and “What I see” amazes me. I do PTL, because certainly He has intervened in our behalf. She has had to give up the WMU Director job and make other adjustments. CHF is a reminder, planet earth is not our home,but heaven. We want to stay here as long as the Lord has Purpose for us and we will. SweetCakes is doing beyond my expectations. SweetCakes has an inner strength, a personal drive, and will that continues to amazes me. She will continue to battle her health challenges as long as she remains on planet earth. Often, hospitalizations require medical doctors unfamiliar with her medical history, it is somewhat amazing to over hear their conversations. Some comments, such as, “She's still here”. We smile and are yet grateful and we do not take anything for granted.

Realistically, I know her heart condition is very serious, life altering, and a life threatening situation. We are always within a couple of days of an ER visit and hospitalization. But, I'm looking backwards to 5-6 hospitalizations this year with the month of June a very defeating month, and July to the present has stability and structure w/o hospitalization.The streak ended 20090928, SweetCakes had to be hospitalized. We believe she had a viral infection. While in the hospital, she experienced what seemed to be a heart attack. The heart doctor did not call it a heart attack. ~~The bottom line is she now has a small blockage in her heart. The plan is to treat the blockage with medication.~~ Betty was hospitalized again 20091014-20091020. An arteriogram was performed. The outcome was no blockages, but the arteries on the bottom of her heart were too small. This condition would create the same type symptoms as blocked arteries.The small arteries are congenital (from birth to present). Care-givers attempt to increase volume flow? .

Ranky, my problems are the same. Management of the chronic pain is better being retired,. Restless Leg Syndrome (RLS) and Peripheral neuropathy in my feet will not get better. My best bet is exercise, rest, and keep moving to maintain my present state. RLS, is in itself a painful condition that disables a number of people. I've said for years, I have the “Can't be still disease” and cannot live in a upright (vertical) world. “ So, I move and lie down horizontal quite a bit. While I did not have the correct medical terms, medical science did eventually prove the descriptions of my conditions to be correct. Over the years, I have had to make adjustments in my life as SweetCakes has.
      My limitations has not limited the God of my life. My limitations has helped me to see other doors open and are to be entered. God always has His work for us to do, if we wish. I do complain some, but truly am grateful for the opportunities He has given me. I know as long as I can pray and have a good mind, then that is a job God is always looking for people to fill.
      We have days that are very bad and are hard to recover from emotionally,spiritually, and physically. But, when we can ride the waves, we ride those waves gladly and with a grateful heart.
      “I'm the busiest man in the world w/o a job.” - Ranky The reason is I have not learned the art of short emails or short conversations and I am slow (methodical,thorough, & just plain slow). I do keep conversations short, when speaking to people who need the short conversation, hopefully.
      My family has rallied to us, when needed. God has been faithful and continues to meet our needs.
“Have as much fun as possible, and then endure the rest.” - Ranky
“Always be yourself, every one else is already taken.” - Oscar Wilde
“Don't look back, something may be gaining on you.” - Satchel Paige
“Everyday is a gift from God” - Many

Hello Real World to Ranky's Then 5 year old Grandson , Sager

2009-09-10T23:14:00.000-05:00

“There is no hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann
(Meaning the events are true and Ranky was one the characters.)
///
Ranky, Sager, "Augon Boy" , & Awesome had gone fishing. Did Imention "Augon Boy" , & Awesome are two more of my grand sons,also. We hooked a few red birds in the trees (it was close) , hooked"Augon Boy", hooked some other rods, even Grandpa

Ranky's rod and reel.
Awesome, the youngest and most vocal, was tired and bored and said so,just not enough action for the video game guys. Patience comes,butslowly, Ranky's patience was running low.
But, We had a good day, 6-7 nice cat fish, just waiting to be cleanedand cooked. So, I had as much fun as a grandpa could stand besides wewere thirsty and hot. We smelled like fish, worms, and sewage.
We rode home singing "Oh, once there were 4 fishermen, fisher,fisher,men,men, fisher, fisher, men,men, Oh, once there were 4 fishermen.
We arrive home tired, dirty, and hungry. Sweetcakes (Grandma) had agood meal prepared. She is the best cook in the world. We cleaned upand ate a good meal, stretched out on the floor and rested.
Ranky was getting sleepy, but knew the fish had to be cleaned. GrandpaRanky said,"Who is going to help me clean the fish?" Sager jumped uphollering," I will, I will, Please Grandpa can I help?" Yes, Sager youcan help. Sager said, "I will go get the soap, wash cloths, and a panof water."
He wasserious. Sager, we clean the cat fish a little bit different. We useknives, wire pliers,water, old towels. Sager watched the process ofskinning, gutting, beheading and flaying the catfish with greatinterest. I thought maybe the shock may have been too much, but herecovered nicely.

We all seem to be quite resilient. I remember believing in Santa Clausuntil I found my Christmas in the car trunk. Man, that hurt. Welcome to"reality shock" Sager, we all get hit with preconceived ideas about howthings should be and how things really are.
Never let the reality of the world, kill your dreams, and the littlekid in you. Ranky is fast approaching 7 years old in my mind and I loveit.

Have As Much Fun As Possible And Then Endure The Rest

2009-09-03T17:47:00.000-05:00

“There is no hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann
The events in this post are true.
////

The neurologists wanted me to try a mixture of different drugs on my feet (Peripheral Neuropathy). The drugs are mixed at places which do compounding. I told the dr, it would not help, but since I was asking him to help me, I would try it. I was told the drug cost would be about $60 and the insurance would not pay for the compound.

I went to the compounding place, they wanted me to fill out a form. First line was easy, My name. I'm good on that one, Ranky. The next line was surprising. Circle one of the following: human, canine, horse, cattle, etc. Well, I believed myself about as human as anyone so I circle human.
At the end of that line, the form asked for pet name. That was too much of an opening for me, I could not resist. I wrote “Nice Buns”, SweetCakes called me that in private a few years ago. I did put a Smiley by it. I wanted to see their reaction, but I had to go. Maybe, they told me to go. They would call my cell phone. They were all nice smiling happy ladies, so I left. I will always wonder about that one.

The purpose of the form was for insurance. BC/BS did pay all but $20+ and the total cost was $120. I had $20+ worth of fun. Did the compound help my feet? "No", but one has to try and always try to have some fun.

SweetCakes hasn't called me, "Nice Buns" in quite a while. While getting out of the shower the other day, I think I heard her say, "Nice Prunes". I could have been mistaken. I did not ask for clarification.

The Perfect Streak of Laughter Has Ended

2009-08-31T16:09:00.000-05:00

“There is no hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann

The events in this post are true.

////

Ranky had begun to tell some humorous real life events in the Abundant Life Class. I always wondered why the class laughed at those events. I asked a lady one day, Why? I knew I would get the straight from her. She said,"That is a good question."

This past Sunday, a joke was not on the agenda. One of the ladies commented on cursing. Quickly, a golfing joke about cursing came to mind. It was a short joke.

As I heard a spider tip-toeing down the wall, somehow I knew this joke had bombed and the streak of laughter had ended.

It had to happen sometime. I actually thought the joke was quite funny and the other real life events, just so so. Something tells me, I just may be out of sync.

“You don’t have to feel guilty, unless you want to.” – Ranky

2009-08-27T15:45:00.000-05:00

“There is no hair growing on this story." - Gerald Mann

The events in this post are true.

When award money is given to an employee for outstanding work during a certain performance period, several people think they should have received award money, also.

At times, maybe those have a valid point, but most of the time, the system seems to work based on the criteria. I thought I should have received an award, too. Honest evaluation of my performance period did not warrant an award at the level received by two of my Coworkers.

Some congratulate the winners and some belly ache. Some of the belly achers begin to attack the work accomplishments of the winners, the unfairness of the system, management favoritism, and the award recipients' character and abilities.

One of the award recipients sat in front of me during the performance period. I watched him (Computer Geek) work hard, take verbal hits, concerning the requirements being pushed by his job, which were agency requirements. In other words, “Don’t shoot the messenger.” Computer Geek did this with grace, dignity, and maturity well beyond his years. He was 26 years old.

One day our area was devoid of people, exception Computer Geek and Ranky. Computer Geek’s heart was cast down. I asked, “What's going on, man?” He told me,” Maybe someone else should have gotten the award, I probably don’t deserve it. Everyone seems to be talking bad about me."

Ranky responded with the following: Computer Geek, I was seated right behind you during the performance period. I know how hard you worked and the verbal assaults or wise cracks made toward you. You handled those well. You got the job done and did it well. The system used to make awards is not perfect, but you met all the requirements and exceeded those requirements. Ranky told him not to let the envy and selfishness of others be his problem. Let it be their problem. Computer Geek you are deserving, I say so and those who made the selections say so.

I believe the Holy Spirit gave me some words at that point in time that Computer Geek will never forget. Neither will I forget, the words were Holy Spirit energized. Ranky said, “You don’t have to feel guilty, unless you want to.” Computer Geek gave me a sheepish grin of an innocent child, saying I never heard that phrase prior to now. Computer Geek, I have never used that phrase until now.

That day, God used Ranky to lift a burden from the heart of Computer Geek. Computer Geek told Ranky, another lady in the company needs to hear what you just told me, she is having the same problem. Ranky did go and tell her. Ranky saw another burden lifted from another Coworker.

Computer Geek searched the internet for 5-6 days attempting to find the quote or something close verbally and in meaning. He told me, He could not find anything, so it must have been original with me. Computer Geek signed Ranky’s retirement card with a phrase, you guessed the phrase correctly. Computer Geek signed, “You don’t have to feel guilty, unless you want to.”

Two or three years later, I searched the internet for the phrase and did get one hit. The phrase must have been borrowed from Ranky.

Ranky tells the Thermos Bottle Joke

2009-08-24T08:05:00.000-05:00

Ranky is the facilitator for the Abundant Life Sunday School Class. One of the members, who was sick, texted Ranky explaining her absence. She also requested that Ranky tell a joke. She was probably not serious, but Ranky is literal-minded and if she wants a joke told, Ranky will tell a joke. He told the joke in the title of this post.
Everyone laughed. One of the mysteries is why did they laugh and most people do laugh when Ranky tells stories in person. "Have as much fun as possible, and then endure the rest." - Ranky

Talking about it is Not the same as doing it.

2009-08-22T20:46:00.000-05:00

Well, I have talked about doing a blog for a year. I went thru the steps just putting some verbage to see how the blog worked. Simple enough, but I did not want to write anything at that time. I had a request from a former co-worker wanting some of my humorous real life events. I used to tell those at work and people always laughed. So, it seemed a good excuse to put those stories in a blog along with some other info and ramblings.